The journey with dementia is often one of profound sadness and challenge. But within the fog of memory loss, the absence of a filter can sometimes lead to moments of pure, unfiltered, and unexpected humor. Moments where they are forever young, get to spend time with long-lost loved ones again, or just blissful ignorance that gives everyone a moment to laugh.
In a viral video, caregivers and loved ones who navigate this difficult reality every day shared these surprising flashes of light, not as jokes, but as cherished moments of absurdity and connection.
My mother has dementia. She does not recognize my 6 foot tall black stepsister. She whispers to me , “I’m not sure who she is, but I’m pretty sure she is a queen. Definitely royalty.”
I had a veteran dementia patient who thought I was his wife. He’d try to get me to find his keys so he could take me in a ride in his sports car. He also took me on multiple “air ballon” rides. We just sat in a chair. Every day was different and I loved him! He was so sweet
Amongst all the lighthearted moments, it’s important to understand the reality that caregivers navigate every day. According to the Alzheimer’s Association, dementia is not a specific disease. Rather, it’s an umbrella term for a decline in mental ability that is severe enough to interfere with daily life.
It’s caused by damage to brain cells, which affects a person’s ability to think, remember, and communicate. While memory loss is the most well-known symptom, dementia also impacts focus, reasoning, and judgment.
In the early stage, a person can still be very independent, but may experience noticeable memory lapses. The middle stage is typically the longest, and this is where many of the unfiltered and surreal moments shared in this list can occur. As the disease progresses, social filters can fade, and the part of the brain that says “you probably shouldn’t say that out loud” isn’t working as it used to.
When my grandma had dementia she offered to steal a rug for me. “You like this rug? I’ll take it for you. They won’t care.” It was my house. My own rug.
my papa thinks that his care home is work and he is the manager they play along but the other day he told me “I fired poor Elaine last week but she keeps coming in and i don’t have the heart to tell her”
This collection of stories was sparked by a now-famous viral video where a nurse recounted a bizarre comment she received from one patient. The curious part is, the comment refers to events from 1865, a time the patient could not possibly have been alive. So, if it’s not a memory, what is it?
Carol Bradley Bursack, an elder care consultant, explains that this is called confabulation, a common symptom in mid-to-late-stage dementia. The brain, struggling with significant memory gaps, will essentially create a plausible, though often historically or personally inaccurate, story to fill in the blanks.
A person experiencing confabulation is not lying; they genuinely believe these created memories are true. Their brain’s filing system is damaged, so it grabs bits and pieces of information from books, movies, or historical events learned long ago and misapplies them to the present reality, leading to these deeply strange and often hilarious moments.
My dementia patient was a farmer. He had a picture of his grandchildren on his tractor he said, “ that’s my tractor but I don’t know who those freakin kids are”
My very religious mother has dementia and referred to a picture of Jesus as “whoever the heck THAT is”
When a loved one says something that is so clearly factually wrong, our first instinct is to correct them. However, Dr. Andrew E. Budson explains that this is often the worst possible approach when dealing with dementia. He says that directly fighting or arguing with a false memory is not only ineffective but can be actively harmful, leading to increased distress for the patient.
The key, Dr. Budson advises, is to remember that the person genuinely believes their false reality. Arguing with them is like arguing with you about what you had for breakfast; it feels like a personal attack. Instead of correcting, the recommended approach is to “go with the flow.”
Acknowledge their reality, validate the emotion behind it, and then gently redirect the conversation. The goal is not to win a factual debate but to maintain a positive, trusting connection and ensure your loved one feels safe and understood, even if their reality doesn’t match our own.
I had one that wanted to teach me how to read. She told me it was our secret and come see her every night at 6:00
My step grandmother had dementia and used to refer to me as “the one who likes to lay on her back” I have 5 children…
My grandfather has dementia and he was talking about me saying how I got so fat!! I said Oh really?! he said Yes, you haven’t seen her? She’s huge? 😩😩. not him gossiping about me with me. I was crying on the inside. 😂
Beyond false memories, dementia often brings a collection of quirky, strange, and sometimes surprisingly sweet new behaviors as the brain’s wiring changes. As explained by the neuro-health company Optoceutics, these shifts are a core part of the condition, and there are several common behaviors that can be observed in people with dementia.
One caregiver shared that their patient constantly believes it’s their 18th birthday, a happy memory the brain has decided to joyfully live in on repeat. Another noted that deep-seated prejudices, like racism, simply vanished, as if the part of the brain that held on to that learned negativity had been wiped clean.
And while it can be painful, not recognizing a child can sometimes lead to a sweet new beginning, like the parent who gossips about their kids, to their kids, as if they were new best friends instead!
my grandfather had dementia and told my mom he took a trip to China so she asked the nurse about it. the specialist saw him that day and the dr was Chinese.
my grandpa had dementia and he told someone ” you dont sweat that much for a fat person ” and fully thought it was a compliment
Being a caregiver for someone with dementia is one of the most emotionally and physically demanding roles anyone can undertake. The daily challenges can be immense, which is why finding moments of light is not just a bonus; it’s a crucial survival strategy.
As caregiving experts at Onyx Home Care emphasize, it is essential for caregivers to consciously look for opportunities to find joy and stay positive, both for their own well-being and for the person they are caring for. The stories shared in this list are a perfect example of this principle in action.
By choosing to embrace the surreal humor of a situation rather than fight it, these caregivers are finding a way to connect with their loved ones in the present moment. These flashes of laughter don’t erase the heartbreak of the condition, but they are a powerful reminder of the enduring love that shines through, even in the most difficult of circumstances.
Do you have any hilarious anecdotes to share from your experiences with dementia? Share your stories in our comment section!
I had a dementia patient who thought she was on a cruise. We would take her to the lido deck for trivia 😎. Every few days she would ask what country we were in
My grandmother with Alzheimer’s always used to tell my mom all the things “those people downstairs” did wrong… we’re the ones who lives downstairs🙈
Omg lol one told me she was NOT watching that little boy again all night who’s parents must of just dropped him off bc he wasn’t her responsibility. The little boy was our young overnight tech Tad who was her 1:1.
My grandma has dementia and doesn’t recognize me. She once asked if I was German and when I said no she said “thank god, that’s okay then”. She’s been extremely hateful towards Germans since WW2 💀
I worked with this lady she German and has dementia so sometimes she speaks in native language and I would have to tell her I don’t speak German she always gets mad at me and say how can you not know German we went to school together.
my dementia patient thinks im his wife, and complains to me that the nursing staff does nothing he tells them and wants them out of our house
My great gran thought I was the meals on wheels boy and everytime I walked past the living room she would say “come in here young man and bring me my food”. That was tough…I was in 6th grade😂😂😂
A dementia patient called me a witch and said I cannot be trusted around her baby doll she carries. 😭
my dementia patient told me that i have to book an appointment with her when she was the one that made the appointment
My mom have demetia. One day she watched a horror movie with vampires. Then she was convinced that she was bitten and about to turn at anytime.
My dementia patient asked me if they can cut off my tattoo when I die, because she wanted to keep it. ‘Too pretty to go to waste’🥹
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